What did the blonde say when she found out that she was pregnant?
I hope it’s not mine.
Death: It’s your time. give me your hand
Blonde: No! i know that if i dont touch you then I’ll never die!
Death: Holy shit! You figured out the key to living forever! You’re soooo smart! High five!
Blonde: *high fives*
Death: Typical blonde… Dumbass…
How do you keep a Blonde busy? Give the Blonde a piece of paper that has the words ‘Turn Over’ on both sides!
Blonde Customer at McDonald’s: how many chicken nuggets come in a 6 piece?
Blonde Cashier : I don’t know let me check.
There’s a blonde. She enters a laughing contest. There’s 10 levels to the contest. She gets to the 9th level and bursts into laughter. The host asks her “Why did you laugh, you could have won.” The blonde reply’s, “I finally got the first joke.”
This is a true story of a poor dizzy blond flying in a two-seater airplane with just the pilot.
He has a heart attack and dies. She, frantic,calls out a May Day.
“May Day! May Day! Help Me! Help Me! My pilot had a heart attack and is dead and I don’t know how to fly. Help Me! Please Help Me!”
She hears a voice over the radio saying:
“This is Air Traffic Control and I have you loud and clear. I will talk you through this and get you back on the ground. I’ve had a lot of experience with this kind of problem. Now, just take a deep breath. Everything will be fine! Now give me your height and position!”
She says, “I’m 5’4 and i’m in the front seat.”
“O.K.” says the voice in the radio…….
“Repeat after me: Our father who art in heaven……..”
16 Blondes are standing outside the bar. Why didn’t they go in?
The sign said 18+